by Natasha | Dec 8, 2025 | Body Awakening ©, Courses and Certifications, For couples, Intimacy, Raising children with a healthy sexuality |
I spent over a year creating my Body Awakening Course, because I wanted it to encompass much more than simply learning a new style of touching. Intimacy, to me, is a whole person experience and I wanted the participants to, at the end of it, recognize touch as something sacred. I imagined them walking away from the 9 months with a feeling of reverence for; the gift of touching another person, the body of the person they touch (whether it be their own or someone else’s) and the sensations that can be experienced through all the wonderful textures that skin provides. Along with this, I wanted them to be aware of and prepared for what can come up when we touch another person’s body in a safe and attuned way. Soft, slow, present touch can create an opening that extends much deeper than the surface of the skin —bringing up intense sensations, emotions, pleasure, resistances, wounds, insecurities and unmet needs in both the person being touched and the person touching. To hold space for this requires self-awareness, attunement, curiosity, communication, reverence and lots of practice.
We began our 9 month online journey learning about ourselves and how experiences in infancy and childhood shape the way we interact in intimacy as adults. We learned to attune to our own breath as a tool for self-awareness and how to expand our breathing patterns so we can safely feel more and ultimately experience more pleasure. We practiced exploring and touching our own bodies to discover what sensations we could feel through our skin, and learned how to combine breath, touch and imagery to increase and plateau those sensations when feeling more gets too much. We developed self-awareness around what gets in the way of our ability to be present when touching others, noticing when it happens and how to continually come back to the sensations in our fingers we feel through our touch. While we practiced all of this individually or in partnership, we came together online every two weeks to share our discoveries, pleasures, doubts, feelings, insecurities, tears and lots of laughter. In this safe, shared space we discovered that we aren’t the only ones who find intimacy challenging, scary and exciting.
We spent 7 months ensuring the quality of what we are able to offer through our touch — whether alone, in partnered intimacy or with clients — before applying our learning to touching others. Body Awakening touch is less about techniques (although there are some) and more to do with getting out of our own way to be present, attuned, curious and reverent to the experience so that who we are really comes through our touch. This, to me, is what intimacy is all about. In the last month of learning, some of the participants chose to participate in the In Person portion of the course where they deepened their practice on each other and then with volunteers from the community. It was an absolute joy for me to witness them creating a cozy space for their volunteer touch partners and welcoming them in with reverence, compassion and curiosity for whatever might come up.
As the teacher and creator of this modality and course, the past 9 months have been more rewarding than any previous work I’ve done. Creating a course that embodies the integrity that I believe touching a body deserves, and witnessing the evolution of the participants as they grow and learn together has been beyond meaningful to me. When we touch in a reverent, present and attuned way, there is no limit to our potential for connection, pleasure, growth and intimacy.
I’m excited to be once again offering this course beginning in March of 2026. There are options for Individuals, couples or practitioners interested in Online learning, In Person Experiential learning and Certification. Early bird registration opens January 5th and I would be honored to have you join. Details on my site and please reach out if you have any questions.
https://natashasalaash.com/body-awakening-course/
by Natasha | Jun 2, 2025 | Awakening, Intimacy, orgasm, Partner sex, Self loving/masturbation, Sexual liberation |
When I began my journey of sexual awakening thirteen and a half years ago, I viewed and experienced sex as a way to please partners’ and feel loved. I had never orgasmed during partner sex or from anyone pleasuring me and, until then, it hadn’t really occurred to me that sex could be for my pleasure too. I knew I was supposed to look like I was enjoying it, but I didn’t know that I could actually enjoy it. I masturbated a lot growing up and experienced orgasm through that, but in all the sex education I received, no one had told me that what I experienced masturbating could be experienced in sex. In fact, I had no idea that pleasure had anything to do with sex at all.
At the age of 32 I realized that I was living my life for others, and my own unacknowledged needs (apart from making others happy) were suppressed so deep that I didn’t know where to even begin finding them. Wanting to connect to myself, I began a daily practice of touching my body and feeling through my fingertips to discover what I needed. In time, with this touch, I upgraded my childhood masturbation method to a more full body experience of pleasure and orgasm. Inspired by the legacy of Betty Dodson©, I decided to incorporate masturbation into partner sex and in doing so, “owned my right to pleasure” as she put it. It took a bit to become unapologetic in this, but once I did, I orgasmed every single time I had sex with my husband. If It happened that he came first, I made sure that our sexual encounter didn’t end until I orgasmed as well. I was embodying what Betty taught me and, through this lens, everything changed.
Now that I was getting something from sex as well, it became something I wanted to do often — not only for him, but to meet my own sexual needs. Knowing what worked for me and not waiting for him to step up and offer me that, I never had to worry about not orgasming. It was up to me. Once I had achieved a high level of proficiency in this area, I felt resourced enough to step back and assess the quality of my sexual experiences. I wondered what other needs I had in intimacy now that this baseline one was filled. With this new level of discernment, I realized that I was “well fed” with orgasms so to speak, and now wanted to focus on the quality of my intimacy. I longed for things I was afraid to ask for — sensuality, slowing down, deeper emotional connection, touching and extended pleasure states. As I began stating my needs and asking for these things, I realized that they all involved a more willing partner.
Nearly fourteen years later, I’ve gone through divorce and built a successful business supporting individuals and couples in all aspects surrounding intimacy. Remarried now, my own sexual intimacy is centered around shared touch, extended states of pleasure, connection and taking time – I know orgasm will always be a part of it — so I focus more on expanding and savoring the journey.
I often hear women who aren’t orgasming in sex, dismiss it as “unimportant” and talk themselves out of it by maintaining that they’re “fine” having sex to feel connected and to keep their partner happy. Ironically these same women often come to me for help with “low libido” (as I once had). I remind them that having sex for someone else’s needs, or as another task on the to do list gets old quickly and it’s no surprise they don’t feel a libido for it. At the same time I often read articles written by sex educators or women proficient in orgasming with partners’, talking down to women who are focused on orgasm. They speak as if orgasm as a goal is for “basic” people and they’re somehow missing the whole point. When I hear this I’m reminded of a quote by Kahlil Gibran I discovered over twenty years ago that has stuck with me since:
“How bravely the glutton counsels the famished to bear the pangs of hunger.”
It’s easy to say orgasm doesn’t matter when you know you can have one whenever you want. It’s easy to focus on the quality of an experience when you feel you have choice in how the experience goes. Many women were raised with so much shame around pleasure that they haven’t learned to orgasm or don’t feel comfortable seeking it out as a right to expect as part of their intimacy.
It is absolutely okay to want to orgasm each and every time you experience sexual intimacy with your partner or yourself. If the narrative was reversed and men were told it didn’t matter if they orgasmed, they’d be rioting in the streets – and rightly so! There is nothing wrong with wanting orgasm for yourself and being committed to that as a baseline in your sexual intimacy. Orgasms feel great, are good for us, release tension, stress and give us amazing feel good chemicals. Why wouldn’t we want them? And, if orgasm is easy for you, it is also okay to want to feel even more satiated in experiences that are less goal-oriented and more savory — like a slow cooked meal vs. fast food. Speaking as a woman who didn’t know how to orgasm in sex for most of my life, or understand it to be an equal right for all, I now know it as such. If orgasming isn’t a part of your proficiency yet, it is well within your right to seek it out as something important, meaningful and fundamental to being human. It is okay to explore your own body to discover what works best for you, incorporate that with partners, acknowledge time needed for it to happen and ask for help achieving it. You have that right. And, if orgasmic people (partners or otherwise) suggest to you it’s not important, you’re welcome to tell them to kindly fuck off. 🙂
by Natasha | Jan 10, 2025 | Awakening, Body Awakening ©, For couples, Intimacy |
Registration for the Body Awakening© online Course for individuals and couples as well as the Practitioner training is now open!
Body Awakening is a beautiful practice for individuals and couples wanting to learn more about their body, how to increase their capacity for pleasure, understand what gets in the way of their optimal sexual functioning and connect with their self and others in a new and meaningful way. Body Awakening touch has been a game changer for my personal intimacy and has provided me with a wider range of tools to help clients struggling with lack of sensations, performance issues, fear of intimacy and desire for more. If you’re interested I invite you to join me in this exploration and welcome any questions you have. https://natashasalaash.com/body-awakening-course/ It’s never too late to have the intimacy you desire.
by Natasha | Sep 27, 2024 | Body Image, connection, Intimacy, Raising children with a healthy sexuality, Sex and mothering, Vulnerability |
As I work with clients bodies helping them learn to feel safe in intimacy, I’m brought back to my time in Kenya learning that our roots of intimacy grow from our initial familial relationships. I sometimes wonder if instead of working with adults I should go back to supporting parents in learning to attune to their infants unique language of expressing needs. But then I realize, I’m playing a part in reparenting the infant inside each of the adults I have the privilege of touching. This story is based on what I learned from the Maasai mama’s that I think so perfectly describes the potential for intimate wisdom that can come from our earliest relationships.
Nashipai spends her days with her four month old baby Kimaren, strapped to her back while she milks cows, cooks, repairs the walls of her cow dung home, and connects with others in her village. From his position on her back he can see the world as Nashipai sees it, experiencing all that she experiences. He feels her muscles flex and bend as she prepares food, fixes walls and goes about the tasks of daily life — absorbing a sense of capability from her movements. With his little body folded fully around her back, he feels the confidence in her posture and a sense of rightness in what she’s doing. Kimaren’s body connects to this feeling and intuitively holds his own back naturally and comfortably straight against his mamas. Sometimes, when her movements become rhythmic — like when she’s mixing porridge or milking the cow — he gets mesmerized by the sensations of their shared rhythm, belly against back. The rhythm of their movement creates a hum deep inside him, something he’s later surprised to realize is there, even when they aren’t moving. Sometimes his hum will start buzzing without mama starting it, and his round little body will wiggle. Responding to his movements, Nashipai laughs, sways and twirls as Kimaren lets his head fall back, giggling with joy at these simple moments together.
Other times, Kimaren will feel a change in his mama’s movements that don’t feel free or flowy like they normally do. This happens when Nashipai is learning something new and isn’t skilled in it yet. On his perch on her back, he clunks along with her clunks, learning in time that as long as they keep going, the clunks will eventually become confident, swift and knowing movements. It’s uncomfortable getting there and he much prefers when she confidently flows, but each time it happens he gains capacity in the unknown that comes before the knowing.
When Kimaren feels an uncomfortable emptiness in his tummy, he wiggles against Nashipai’s back for help to make it go away. Nashipai, who’s learned what this wiggle means, slides him around to her chest and offers her warm breast for nourishment. Feeling the soft roundness of her breast against his cheek, Kimaren opens his mouth and begins to suckle. The empty feeling in his tummy is replaced by the warm milk and, once full, he contentedly falls asleep. This symbiosis helps him at times when the uncomfortable emptiness arises and mama is in the middle of something that she can’t stop right away. Using her soft, soothing voice she tells Kimaren in words he feels but can’t understand, that what he needs will come in just a few more minutes. It’s uncomfortable but, because she always responds, Kimaren has come to trust his needs will always be met. So he waits.
Later, he’s woken by an uncomfortable feeling of fullness and again wiggles to tell his mama. Nashipai, feeling the difference in this wiggle, responds by gently lowering him to the ground and holding his knees up to his chest. Recognizing the cue, Kimaren lets the water fall from between his legs onto the dirt underneath until his tummy feels comfortable again. Mama always knows just what he needs because she’s always listening.
Nashipai knows everyone in the village, and with Kimaren’s cheek resting on her shoulder, he gets to know them too. He especially loves to see the faces that make mama’s body get soft and warm and he notices his own body become soft and warm in response. One face in particular lights mama up so much it feels like there’s a fire burning deep inside her. Kimaren watches this face and notices the way their eyes and body open towards mama like they’re inviting her in. His heart beats faster with hers and he recognizes a shared truth between the three of them; the truth of just how special mama is. His hum hums, and even though he can’t see her face, he knows mama is smiling.
Kimaren is most curious though about the faces that make mama tense and tighten, her hum go quiet and her fire dim. He notices that their eyes and arms are closed and they look down on her instead of welcoming her in. Kimarens body tightens against his mamas in response, and when she feels that, her hum starts buzzing inside her. All the muscles in her back go solid and he feels her body get bigger with every breath she takes. Even though the face was higher than mama before, it now seems like she’s looking down on them. Kimarens body softens in response to mama’s buzzing hum, and he settles against her curves, unafraid, soaking in a deep sense of her knowledge, capability, softness and strength. Being so close to mama, Kimaren is always listening too.
At night time, while mama lays beside Kimaren in their sheepskin bed, she traces her hands over the dips and curves of his whole body. Mama’s fingers are rough from hard work, but her touch is soft and curious and Kimaren senses her own pleasure as she lingers extra long over the grooves and folds of his chubby legs and neck. His body softens more the longer she touches, and he sinks deeper and deeper into the bed. Kimaren notices his hum is constant, like the purr of a cat. The feeling he has when mama touches him this way is something he can’t understand until he recognizes it later on in life when he’s a man touching his own wife and children in the same way that his mama touched him. Skin to skin, body to body …… this is the wisdom of intimacy.
by Natasha | Sep 9, 2024 | Intimacy, Intimacy Coaching, Posts, Raising children with a healthy sexuality, Sex and mothering |
“You just plunk yourself down beside me and that makes me feel safe. Like there’s nothing wrong with me or my body. I’m just normal.”
“The way you rested your hand on my leg while you were touching me with the other hand, made me feel like you’re not scared to be close to me and that you’re okay with touching me.”
I’m a mother. I touch you with the same comfort that I touched my five babies. Carrying them on my back, breast feeding, sleeping beside them for years on end — I’m comfortable beside your body and I’m comfortable touching your body.
Legs overlapping legs.
Baby suckling my breast.
Inhaling sweet milk breath while I sleep.
Baby on my back.
Smelling sun sweat on their heads.
Covering the pee spot with a blanket until morning so I don’t have to get up.
My half asleep hands reaching in the dark to make sure they’re all still warm.
It wasn’t delicate. It wasn’t careful. It was normal life. It was getting the job done…..
Well…. sometimes it was delicate, and sometimes it was careful.
Tracing the contours of their skin with my fingers, over and over.
Feeling and learning their bodies textures and grooves like a map I never need to look at to remember.
Knowing who needs an extra hand of support today and who doesn’t, without asking.
Imagining the best possible reason for their behavior.
Empathizing with their emotions.
It’s an immersion in intimacy. It’s mothering. I didn’t learn it in any training or in any book. Others might, but for me this comfort came from living it with my children and then later learning to feel it with my own body. Mothering has been my greatest teacher.
by Natasha | Dec 18, 2023 | Body Awakening ©, Intimacy |
As I get ready to turn the page of my client log book for 2023, I’m reflecting on how much growth and learning this year has given me.
I was fortunate to support 916 clients – 488 women, 366 men and 62 non binary humans this year. I started offering a piece of my heart through “Body Awakening” sessions which help clients learn to; identify what “yes” and “no” feel like in their body and communicate it, anchor to presence during intimacy so that they can feel MORE, relax into their body to allow for the natural function of arousal to happen, regulate with their breath and explore pleasure. I teach this through either touching clients myself or guiding couples in how to offer Body Awakening to each other. I facilitated my first week long “Intimacy Immersion” experience with a couple, completed level 3 of an Integrative Trauma and Attachment Treatment Model training, learned to “Love Another Way” in a course on boundaries and am currently training in Genital Dearmouring.
In 2024, I’m excited to go to California for hands on Genital Dearmouring training, expand my office space to include this as one of my services, offer couple’s intimacy workshops facilitated by myself and my husband (saying that is also new for me in 2023!) and continue writing my book on – you guessed it – Intimacy!
As always, I’m in awe of the endless connections between mothering babies, and helping adults feel safe enough to tip toe into experiencing their limitless capacity for connection and pleasure. Thank you to everyone who allowed me to accompany them on their intimacy journey this year and I’m excited to keep learning and expanding with you all next year!
