I’ve written this in an attempt to describe orgasm techniques that I have developed from hours and hours of practice alone and during partner sex. When I first began this sexual awakening I found it difficult to understand techniques that were explained in technical terms. I knew that I was supposed to breathe, squeeze my vagina and move my hips and that there were reasons for doing all of these things, but it just didn’t make sense to me to look at my body and my orgasms as a machine and a product that comes from it. My vagina isn’t an “elevator” that needs to lift up and down as some doctors would say. I understand this concept and why this description may work well for some, but this kind of teaching breaks my heart a little bit.
I’m not teaching mechanics. I am encouraging women to look at their body, pleasure and orgasms in a different way. A way where I explain kegals in terms of drawing sexual energy deeper and higher into your body with every squeeze. Where body movement becomes instinctual and is guided by the movement of your hands, where touch becomes a medium for opening up parts of yourself that were closed, and where breath is the life blood of your orgasms.
This intimacy with myself has become my spiritual connection with a higher power and that higher power IS my relationship with my self. Through my orgasms I connect to my body and the world around me in a way that I never knew was possible.
I want to go deeper into me.
Pleasure follows my fingers as they trace imaginary lines over the curves of my body. The more I touch the more I can feel and, with this touch, my pleasure becomes a memory that cannot be forgotten. I make endless discoveries with my fingers – and much like the anticipation of opening a gift – everyday I look forward to discovering what this touch will open up into me.
Leaving my mind and entering into my body I surrender to the feel of my hands on my skin and begin to breathe deeper – more fully. My breath is waking me up from the inside out. Fingers softly touching my thighs my body shudders as currents of sexual energy are waiting to be released. Already close to the edge of an orgasm I’m not ready to let go just yet. I want to go deeper into me.
Following the muscles and contours of my skin my fingers begin to move in a spiral pattern until my hips, unable to stay still, join in. Lured by this circular movement the rest of my body follows and I keep focus on the feel of my fingers on the outside and the flow of my breath on the inside. This is an intimate dance with myself and my touch and my breath are leading the way.
Close to the edge of orgasm once again, yet still unwilling to release the powerful energy flooding into my body, I slow down my breath – drawing it in deeper. Teasing myself with my touch – I give it, then pull it back. Every time I lift my fingers off of my body, the air on my skin draws them back – like an echo calling out for more. I want more of this pleasure. I want more of this touch. I want to open this pleasure up INTO me.
Squeezing the muscles in my vagina I visualize this energy of mine and draw it deeper into me. Up, up, up I pull it inwards until my whole body is filled and alive with the pleasure of myself. Harder now my fingers move on my skin, pressing into the energy that is wanting to explode out of me.
Right on the edge now I just don’t want to let it go. I want to know this place. I want to see what other unopened treasures are waiting here for me. My fingers seek out untouched skin as I deepen my breath and quicken my body’s movements while squeezing my muscles faster and pulling upwards. I’m drawing this energy up higher. Into me it comes.
Overwhelmed now with what I see before me I know that it’s time to let go of this edge. I crave this surrender yet I struggle to hold on. Letting go of the edge means letting go of the control that holds me the rest of the time. Orgasms are my ultimate surrender.
Holding my hand between my legs I moan loudly and let go, and from deep inside of me my muscles contract and release. Each contraction sends off violent and intense waves of pleasure as the energy, that I had pulled up into me, is let go from my body. Waves crash over and over into me, turning my moans into laughter as I press harder against my pussy and move my body faster – riding out this bliss. In this moment I am my orgasm and my orgasm is me. Even if someone else has given it to me, it comes from my power, my strength, my wonder and my pleasure. Knowing this empowers me.
Flushed and sweating I fall back – body shaking from the last waves pulsating through me. I feel alive, awake and open. In awe of my body, my sexual energy, and my pleasure, my hands begin again to trace the lengths of my hips leading to my core. My breath catches as I build towards the edge again…….but I’m not ready to let go just yet…..
I want to go deeper into me.
Very beautiful Natasha. Things are going very well for me. Sometimes in the last weeks since I met you I worry that I will forget, that I will go back to a time before all this, but I am becoming more and more sure of myself knowing what to do, how to take care of myself. Just this afternoon I had one of the most amazing ones yet !!! And your techniques make so much sense, the rocking, the breathing. I’m figuring out more and more how to breath and delay, and enjoy. Today and many times sense I am left shaking, pulsing, and the energy I have released and taken in is like nothing I ever experience before. So so nice. I see why people talk about orgasms as useful to get rid of headache, or to relieve tension from work or just to enjoy some quiet time alone. It is becoming this beautiful wonderful awesome new way of life for me. Everything you taught me was so perfect and I am so thank ful to live in this time and place where I have the opportunity to reach out and learn this way of life and of my body. I have already shared some with other women and will willing open to share with those who seek out knowledge or support. You are a wise gratious woman Natasha. Thank You. I know alot of this newness came from my self and my own determination and committment to myself. I wrote to Betty and that was the word she use for me “commitment” thats what it takes 🙂 So grateful for women around me to support me and share with me !! We deserve it.
Wow Megan I am thrilled!!! This comment is the whole reason that I do this work!!! You are totally getting it and the fact that you know that it comes from yourself and your own determination and commitment is just awesome.
This line you wrote “I am left shaking, pulsing, and the energy I have released and taken in is like nothing I ever experience before.” is the best!!!!! I fucking love that you have it! <3 so much love to you.... Please keep telling me about your awesome orgasms....
Yeah, Natasha. I had one like that last week. It’s a wonder we don’t just make love to ourselves 24/7.
That’s the beauty of sexual pleasure with a full body orgasm. It’s self-regulating.
Don’t tempt me Betty!!! If I had the time…….Self regulating is a great term.
Betty!!!! Wowsers. Thank you so much for your amazing work and the legacy you are leaving. You and Natasha have taught me things that the world didn’t naturally teach me growing up. You made the information available. and it is just so wow amazing that I am able to live in the wonderful time and place where maybe there is some sort of shift going on , where dynamics can change, and women can embrace pleasure and themselves and each other and men. lol. LOL I got stoned last night for the first time in a long time and I have this amazing idea…. one of my un realized fanatasies/dreams is to have a shop. I grew up working in flower shop. I just love organizing and shop keeping. and a dreamt about starting like a Positive Passions like store here in Nebraska, wear we would sell the usual stuff but also have classes and gatherings for women. dance, meditation, maybe someday bodysex, IDK…something to fantasize about : )
Thats a great idea Megan!!! go for it!!!! Betty always says “The present moment is the point of power. ” <3